His Light Shines

I am sorry that I've waited to long to write this post.

Everyday I get on the this wonderful computer I visit many 'fun places and friendly faces'. Among that those places and faces, I've found a friend from my past. A friend who has become near and dear to my heart, although years and miles have separated us.

Aubs,
I look forward to 'catching up' with you and the boys whenever you have a new post. I thank you for the time you take to write and share your life with me and others.

The life of a military wife is not an easy one. Those who serve our country and their families have touched my life in may ways. I'd like to share this with you:
Tabitha (Bode) DeLaney and I have known each other since Kindergarten. We've kept in touch all these years and we are proud godparents to Jace and Zach. We flew down to Texas for Jacelynn's baptism when she was months old. At the time, Craig (Tabitha's husband) had been deployed and had been gone since Jacelynn was 3 weeks old. The things that I have seen Tabitha and the trials she faced as a new/single mother is the very thing that binds my heart to hers. Craig was allowed to return for 3 days for Jace's baptism.
As Eric and I witnessed this new family being separated it touch our lives forever. It was that day we learned just how selfish we had become. The greatest thing we discovered was just how precious time is. We were overjoyed to begin our journey as parents that day and 9 months later Luke was born.
It was through the military that Eric had to learn to put away childish things and learn what kind of man he wanted to be. It was also the driving force for our wedding.
The Lord uses many means to execute His perfect plan and will for our lives.

Even now I find the military a part of my life, though we do not serve. It is through your strength and courage that I find inspiration for my own strength and courage. There are days that I remind myself of the promise that 'He will not give me more than I can handle.' There is a reason God designed the family structure to be that of two- both a husband and a wife. We do not have the strength of our own to face the challenges of motherhood single handily, life for that matter. 'With God all things are possible.' God intends for us to rely on Him.

It is in you that I see His light and His strength. I know that you are special for our Father has called you not only to the greatest calling, that of a mother, but that of a single mother (when He calls your husband to serve). It is a wondrous testimony of your faith in our Father, dependence on His strength and the glory brought for His name sake.

Praise God for YOU, Aubs. Glory to our Lord God most high who gives strength to His people.

Trading my frustrations for His peace

Frustration is an emotion that I deal with on a minute by minute basis for one reason or another. When I took time to really sit and share my frustration with my Father, I took the time to listen to His calming truths.


Frustrating....
A boy who grows up in a disfunctional home: taught how to make bad decisions more than good ones. For we all know that children learn by example. What will happen to this boy? He will one day become a man and thus a member of our community and head a family. So the cycle will continue and be passed down from parent to child.

Peace....
Was there any point when they cycle could have been broken? I want to say yes, for I am an example of a broken cycle. Is it God's will? Not right now. God answers my prayers with a 'not right now'. It is His will for this boy to be where he is. Sadly, God lets us make mistakes (for I have made many), to mold us to what He wills for us.



Frustrating....
Being on the outside of a situation and seeing the future outcome of poor choices being made in the present. Seeing another repeating cycle and not having the power to change it.

Peace....
I'm thankful that I am NOT in control and everything works to His honor and glory.



Frustrating....
"For all sin and fall short of the glory of God." Losing my temper at my babies yelling at them to pick up the toys. I brought disappointment to my Father.

Peace....
Thankful for His mercy and forgiveness.



Frustrating....
Seeing my Dad live a life without the Lord. My Dad is my Dad, and to see him almost homeless, disabled, low and struggling---all the while leaning on his pride and stubbornness---is heartbreaking and draining.

Peace....
Again, God answers my prayers with "MY PLAN not yours."


Frustrating....
Learning to lean on God and let go. Letting go of a good friendship because the Lord is calling me and she has different priorities right now. Wanting to talk to her but something holds me back....?

Peace...
I am leaning on God for wisdom and clarity- both of which He has already promised.

A Virtual Drinking Game

Back in my younger days I played a drinking game called
"Have you ever..."
Here's how it works one person starts out with "Have you ever..." and then adds something to the end. Everyone who HAS, takes a drink. Let's play shall we?!

HAVE YOU EVER:

-woke up on the wrong side of the bed?

-thrown a temper tantrum because you woke up on the wrong side of the bed?

-said things you didn't mean to the person you love the most because you woke up on the wrong side of the bed?

-been so angry with yourself for not getting your chores done that you took it out on someone else, maybe because you woke up on the wrong side of the bed?

-wished for more romance?

-wished for more romance, got an entire evening full of romance, then turned it into "taking time away for the chores you were doing" by saying things you didn't mean because you were mad at yourself, possibly because you woke up on the wrong side of the bed?

-treated someone badly?

-treated someone so badly, that when they apologized to you, you couldn't wait to "let them have it" with the selfish sinful thoughts on your own self-centered mind and thus stomping all over their apology, because you woke up on the wrong side of the bed?

-witnessed first hand what self-sacrificing means?

-witnessed a husband not say a word to his wife when she behaves like a BRAT?

-witnessed a husband who is willing put on a dirty undershirt and wear it to work because his wife didn't do the white laundry, not say an unkind word to his wife (who is a BRAT, by the way), apologize for waking his wife up on the wrong side of the bed, and still go to work FOR HER so that she can stay home to do her work and provide her with everything she could ever need or want, all by God's grace?

-played a game (hypothetically) and could possibly have alcohol poisoning when it's over?


Have you ever?

One of those days

Here I sit in the bedroom with a wonderfully old movie from 1955, with my thoughts and tears.

What's wrong with me I just don't know..... or do I? Self pity? Not enough time spent with the Lord? Too much to do? Not working out enough? Tired? My broken sewing machine? Hormones? Girlie-ness?

It's just been "one of those days."

Funny, just as I typed that last sentence I reached for my water and ended up dumping it all over my night stand and the floor. And so it continues....

You'll have to excuse me for a minute as I sit here an have a piece of PITY PIE.

To save myself a little embarrassment I'll loose myself in "The Tender Trap" and put a cover on my PIE.

Moments

I was so disappointed that I went off and left my camera, thus missing this special day with the kids. Oh well, maybe next time. At least I'm taking the time to write about it, right?

Today was an on and off sunny day, a little chilly around 50 degrees, and somewhat disappointing after having several days of 75 degrees. The girls and I headed to town to pick up Luke at preschool and found the diggers working on the road just across the parking lot of the school. It took me twice as long to get the girls inside because Kayla was engrossed in the digger action. With all three buckled and back in the car, my little preschool reporter proceeded with his rendition of the day's activities. Mid story, he asked if we could have a picnic. My heart was heavy as I explained that it was too cold to have a picnic in the park. I wanted to go to the park too. Just then I recalled a chapter from a book we are reading in the mom's group entitled "Jump In". The chaptered challenged moms to find an activity to "jump in" with your kids. After a quick "thank you" to my heavenly Teacher, I turned the car around and headed towards McDonald's and proudly screamed out "CAR PICNIC" !!!!!
Much to my delight I head a "Yay" and a "WooHoo".
We picked up McDonald's and drove back to Luke's preschool. We parked on the edge of the parking lot and opened up the back. I spread out the picnic blanket and we piled into the back with our food to watch the digger. It was such a precious memory counting the many dump trucks that came and went, laughing at the silly way Krista ate her fries and just taking time to really ENJOY my kids. All the thoughts of spending $8 on lunch (when we had a full fridge and pantry at home), faded away with every point and wave at the machines and the workers. With one last little "ByeBye Digger" we ended our lunch and headed home.

It wasn't until later that afternoon that I truly took time to reflect.
With the time spent on our picnic I was behind on the daily chores. I piled two overflowing baskets of unfolded laundry on the bed. I was about half way through when a little princess head peaked around the mound of clothes. "Hi Mommy", and with that Kayla climbed up. She crushed my fears of "helping" and was content just to sit next to me while I folded and folded. With just two shirts left to fold I felt a little hand on my back, followed by a pat. I sat there as my two year old ran her hand sweetly up and down my back, all the while praising God for her. It is awesome how God gives the gift of affection to women and to see it displayed at such a young age moved me to tears.

These are the moments that make life worth living, and it is these precious moments that I need to seize and treasure, because they are just that- moments- that will pass if I don't.

How fitting the Motivation for Moms today:
Show your children that you appreciate them by doing something special just for them, like making their favorite meal, or taking them out for an ice cream.